| Author |
 Topic Search  Topic Options
|
.Mel 
Senior Member
Joined: 14 January 2007
Location: Orewa
Points: 9078
|
 Post Options
 Thanks(0)
 Quote  Reply
 Posted: 09 June 2008 at 2:08pm |
|
I do think it's really sad that they didn't feel that they could come to you and tell you privately what they had done.
|
Mr Mellow (16)
Miss Attitude (8)
Destructa Kid (3)
|
 |
|
Sponsored Links
|
|
|
minik8e
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Taranaki
Points: 5838
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 09 June 2008 at 2:33pm |
|
Hrmmm....when we got engaged we told our close friends and family ourselves....but a lot of others (mainly sisters/nieces/nephews who we don't see very often at all) probably found out from my Bebo status being updated... In saying that though, the majority of them will get an invite to the wedding (actual invite, not email!!) so yeah. That was just easier as my family is flung so far and wide and is rather large and we aren't in regular contact with a lot of them...
|
|
nikkitheknitter
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Westie
Points: 7556
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 09 June 2008 at 2:51pm |
|
Oh yeahhhh... I just remembered the whole paper thing. That was how most people found out about engagements in the past... facebook the new "births, deaths, and marriages" section?
(Again, I'm talking in general. Still would be pissed if a close friend didn't tell me)
|
|
almostthere
Senior Member
Joined: 22 November 2007
Location: Auckland
Points: 386
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 09 June 2008 at 3:14pm |
 OK your own SISTER!!!??? Id be very  if i found out my sister had married via a newspaper!
|
|
|
|
minik8e
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Taranaki
Points: 5838
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 09 June 2008 at 4:07pm |
|
I'd mostly agree Kaycey....although we have no idea what kind of relationship the sisters have. One of my sisters would likely find out via the newspaper, simply because we're not close (although, she wouldn't get an invite either, so that's what I mean by not close). Sometimes families can be pretty messed up.
|
|
marielb
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 535
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 09 June 2008 at 7:41pm |
|
I think its rude and would be really upset if a good friend did that. I've found out that acquaintances have got pregnant/engaged etc on facebook, but thats soooooooo different
|
|
Isaac is 6, Ethan is 4, Rico is 2 and Hunter is almost 1!
|
|
Paws
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Auckland
Points: 5860
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 09 June 2008 at 8:19pm |
 marielb wrote:
I think its rude and would be really upset if a good friend did that. I've found out that acquaintances have got pregnant/engaged etc on facebook, but thats soooooooo different |
That's my thought, acquaintance is one thing but really close/best friends.....
Anyway, after talking it out with someone else this over I've figured my best course of action is to let it go. I think where the freind (espically in the case of M) has been made pretty clear. As was said to me maybe one day we'll sort things out but now is not the time to get into a fight over it. I guess this is partly a case where a case where a friendship has grown apart, I'm just also sad it's really for the wrong reasons (ie her objection to him having close female friends).
I am glad to know that it's not just me, that others would be hurt or upset too. I really shuddered to think that such actions would be considered perfectly acceptable etiquette today!
|
|
|
|
AnnC
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Taranaki
Points: 6796
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 09 June 2008 at 8:41pm |
I think the comment about the internet in general being the new newspaper is correct... to a point. I have a fewclose friends on here and facebook etc.. and if they had told me they had gotten married, had baby, got pregnant etc... on here I would be upset (but would so be upset if i found out via the newspaper too) but for general friends if i found out that way I would except it - although still would be slightly upset the didn't text me about it first.
Considering Paws your friends were close yes you have a right to be upset.
On another note guess it depends how much you talk (other than internet) as well.
I do get upset as well when I get told by a friend not so close about my close friends and wonder why they got confided in rather than me (and I am the confide in me type person)... but thats my gripe and this is about you 
|
Ann
Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10)
|
|
fattartsrock
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 6441
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 09 June 2008 at 9:55pm |
|
I do think it is rude, for sure, but unfortunately that is how society functions now days. Terribly rude and impersonal.
|
|
The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P
|
|
Roxy
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 231
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 09 June 2008 at 11:19pm |
|
I'd be really gutted.Im really sensitive about things though.But I wouldnt do that to my friends.Im a bit of a dinasaur with computers so I dont go for the whole facebook thing etc.I rather have a proper talk.And that sad that your friends partner feels resentful of you.Id be bummed bout that too.Maybe you need to make more effort to make her see that she neednt be?Your friend is probably missing that contact with you but in a difficult situation?
|
|
Caleb 15/11/02 Brooke 14/11/05
|
|
Paws
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Auckland
Points: 5860
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 10 June 2008 at 9:09am |
Roxy wrote:
And that sad that your friends partner feels resentful of you.Id be bummed bout that too.Maybe you need to make more effort to make her see that she neednt be?Your friend is probably missing that contact with you but in a difficult situation? |
I wish it was that easy! I do get on with her and she is a very sweet girl. But her Christian views are a lot more hard core than mine when it comes to friends of the opposite gender. Bottom line for her is that no matter if I'm a "threat *snort*" or not, M and I should never ever be anywhere alone together (including in a public place) and hugging really does not make her comfortable. Sadly it is her beliefs so nothing will change that. She is entitled to them but it does make me sad that I appear to have now lost a best friend of seven years because of them. 
|
|
|
|
Paws
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Auckland
Points: 5860
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 10 June 2008 at 9:22am |
|
And having just found out I'm amoung the last to know, it really is a reflection on the friendship...ok letting it go.
|
|
|
|
marielb
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 535
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 10 June 2008 at 5:13pm |
Isn't it sad that in our society its pretty much ok to treat friends with so little thought   (in this and many other situations)
|
|
Isaac is 6, Ethan is 4, Rico is 2 and Hunter is almost 1!
|
|
Acceptable or kinda rude?
