blah, blah, BLAH

I feel like I am totally losing my grip on reality at the moment. I was just starting to get a hold of my anxiety and panic attacks and now I have had the rug pulled out from under my feet.

Our landlord rang the other night to say they are putting our house on the market!! So it looks like we are moving and that scares the sh*t out of me.

Where do I start, we have to get this place up to scratch for people to come through (big job), we have to house hunt, then move etc, on top of that we have Micheals 10th birthday in less than two weeks and I have done nothing for it and to make my life even more complete my in laws arrive the day before Micheals party for 9 days!!! Add to that my breathing and relaxation classes (Ha fat chance) and various school meetings and I am officially a basket case!!!!!!

I have had major trouble especially over the last few months keeping on top of even the little things I have no idea how the heck I am going to handle all of this. I woke up at 5-30 this morning and felt so sick (one of my many physical symptoms of anxiety) and it wears me out.

For the first time I feel like I have really lost control, it feels like someone is trying to drown me and I can't fight them off. then to make matters worse my mother tell me this morning that if I don't pull my act together soon, I'll run the risk of having my kids taken off me WTF thanks mum!!!

I'm sorry for the rant it's just all getting to me!

Oh Vick.....Big hugs!!
Every one of us go thru days like these....honestly you will pull thru! And that is not a very nice thing to say (your mum)..you dont abuse your kids and love them to bits so why would that happen??

And since your Inlaws are coming, make them useful...get them to help you out with the house and the kids so you can have some relax time! and once that happens you can get your strength back and do what you have to.

And you know we are here for you, when ever you need to vent. I know it always makes me feel better!!



Edited to say: Debs plan would work too...he he ha ha LOL

Edited by Roksana

Gosh if I was closer I'd offer to take in a kid for a morning a week or something.... how's your DH in all of this? I feel for you with a house on the market, it's a tough job. We did it last year (with our own home) and the best advice I can give is to pack up some "unnecessary for 3 months" items as you clean now, mark them well and put them in a (yours or a friend's) garage, and that way there's less to keep on top of.

Are your in-laws the laze-about type or would they be able to help out if they knew what was going on?

And that's a horrible thing for your mum to say. You've been proactive with breathing classes etc, so I think she's WRONG.

Thank guys, it's been a very up and down day, I'm off to see the a registrar shortly to try and sort out new meds, so fingers crossed.

Debs you crack me up. I wish I could think in such a straight forward matter or fact manner.

Thanks for the advice everyone, my in laws are very nice people so I am lucky and I know they will help out where they can, so that is a bonus I just stress whenever they come as I want everything to be perfect for them (not their fault).

I like the idea of packing some stuff up now, I might get some boxes. And the list it might make things a little easier.

I have the real estate agent coming over tomorrow to take photo's etc so that should be fun.

As for my mother nothing should surprise me anymore but that just blew me away. I love my kids more than life itself and for her to say that was mind blowing. 101 on how to kick a person when they are down.

And your right this site has been fantastic especially lately, for a place to vent and get support.

Oooppps I'm going to be late for my appointment crap.

Hey Vick - you can do this!  You can get through the next few weeks, and things are gonna really look up after then - you'll have the in-laws out of your hair, Michael will have enjoyed his birthday, and you'll be in a new house.   to ya.  I thoroughly agree with Deborah too!  And can your in-laws babysit while you go to the breathing and relaxation classes?  'cause I really think it's important to keep those up - you're doing them for all the right reasons and something that helps you shouldn't be first to be struck off the list when the squeeze is on.  Your in-laws might jump at the opportunity for some time alone with the kids. 

And one more thing - anxiety and panic attacks don't make you a bad mum.  You're a star for working through them and doing the job you're doing of raising your kids. 

I had an idea... you could mention open homes and tidiness to the kids and ask for their ideas for Michael's birthday. It could be quite a conversation starter!

thinking happy thoughts for u

Oh Vick! That seriously sucks.

Deb gave great advice

Best of luck with it all and hope you make it out the other side feeling as relaxed as ever! You can do it!

BIG to you Vick!!

That is awful what your mum said.

I swear by rescue rememdy. I went through a period of anxiety etc when Brenna was first born and RR was my life saver!!!!

I agree with Amy - writing a list would help. Especially if your in-laws are the helpful kind, I am sure that they will be able to help you out (whether it be with things on the list, or just taking the kids away for a while so you can have some time with no distractions).

Keep your chin up . We are all thinking of you