hard going

Hey all
i had a blood test today - i have to stay on the buserilin injections for another week they say- my levels are still too high
i felt bad the last few days - terrible PMT symptoms and so real pmt too
the sister in law phoned saying "are you pregnant yet" (she has a brand new baby - 9 months exactly after she got married)- she says to me you should hurry up and have a cousin for baby -aaahhh
my workmate says ill be a surrogate for you - i have no trouble getting pregnant
i feel like no one really understands me- none of my friends down here have struggled to get pregnant
tonight i was crying
i think ill have tomorrow off work - although i know it will make next week busier for me
oh yeah - and i have another client whos kicking herself for getting pregnant again!!! (i do social type work)

Just a hard week - and id been doing so well
i hate that this is so hard
i feel like saying no more i cant do it
im sick of the injections - the blood tests
i feel like screaming NO ONE UNDERSTANDS
i feel like running away for a holiday

and now i feel fat - coz i didnt feel well i missed going to the gym for a week

ok - deep breaths
now i have shared i feel a little better
i cant wait to hear from u guys

feeling sad
emile

Emile - big hugs to you

I'm sad to hear you are having a rough time.

It is hard but hang in there matey.
Take care and hope you have a better day tomorrow

Just remember, it's a means to an end that you desperately want Emile.

I went to a seminar at FA the other night, and they called non-infertile people DHACs (Don't Have a Clues) which is perfectly right. Remember that. You have to put them to one side in your mind. There are those that try to understand, but it is hard for them too, because they have nothing to base it on.

Have you had any counselling sessions with your IVF? It sounds like it would be a good idea, even if you have to pay for them. They will understand and be able to help you work through your grief (it is a form of grief all this, by the way).

I hope you're feeling better today though.

Hi Emile

There are lots of us who do understand and our thoughts are with you. It's bad enough when people who don't know about your situation unknowingly make hurtful remarks, but even worse when people who should know better don't stop to think. and some days just seeing Mums pushing prams is all it takes. But I hope you feel better today and can take some comfort in the fact that things are moving in the right direction for you now, and hopefully, one day, all this will be a distant memory.