I didn’t want it to happen again!!

I'm feeling really down atm. Life has just been really full on lately and I've finally crashed, I think.

I've been flat out studying etc, and the babies just keep on getting sick. Now I have exams coming up and I'm so behind in study, and my brother's engagement party was at the weekend so we had to haul the kidlets up to Chch, and couldn't find a babysitter so had to take them to the party and try and get them to sleep downstairs, there. And lo and behold, Chloe was up most of the party with yet another illness, which Ollie now has as well. She's on her second lot of antibiotics and steroids in the last month, and having her spacer and inhaler heaps.

So not only did I not get to study all weekend, but we had a really stressful, high strung and sleepless weekend that was full of travel and inconvenience. I loved being able to go to the party, I just feel like it cost us a whole lot to go (not just money value), emotionally and physically.

Anyway, now DH and I have the bug that the kidlets have, and I'm totally worse for wear and unable to study. I feel like packing it in altogether because I'm already so far behind, study wise. My exams are next week and the week after. I'm so worn out. But even resting at home is stressful because I just sit here feeling guilty because I should be studying.

I've been feeling so down for the last 3 days, just feel like crying. I can't afford to be sick, and I can't afford to crash for another couple of weeks, but it seems that it's happened. At the moment I'm just really battling all these horrible depressed thoughts and I can't believe that I have hit this point again, at the worst time. I finally felt like the whole PND thing was under control with meds and stuff, I've been functioning really well for most of the second half of this year. I think I really overdid it, taking on way too much too soon... but I really felt better and thought I could handle it.

Hugs to you. Just wanted to add don't be shy to ask about impaired performance for your exams. You'd definitely qualify!

Hugs hun, you have so much going on all the time, I think you're doing so well even if it doesn't feel like it to you, I'm pretty sure everyone around you thinks your amazing!

I second just waiting re the PND thing till exams are over - it could be that its stress-related, and not PND-related (although I know one thing can lead to the other).

Just think - only a few more weeks to go (I think?) then you're all done and dusted for the year, it'll be coming onto summer so the illnesses will go away and you can enjoy life. Is there anything any of us can do/send to you or anything to make life a little easier? Just ask anyway, if there's anything I can do

Oh Little bug

I understand where you're coming from re: Stress of exams etc. I've got 5 assignments due in the next two weeks, am behind in my studies because I kept putting everything else first....I've barely started any of the assignments! You definitely should talk about this to your DP...sometimes all you need is an hour or so to set out a plan of what you need to study and when it can happen. If you know what you're gonna be tested on then focus your study around your strongest areas. If it is all too much (which is ok) then look into Agrotat marking or impaired performance...but look into it now. I hope things work out for you, the end is sooooo close!...you can almost reach out with your hand and grab it.

from me too. And commiserations with you and Eva too from another mum that takes too much on - end of semester sucks big time. I don't have any experience on the PND side of things (thank goodness) but really just wanted to say there is light at the end of the tunnel even if it doesn't feel like it right now. At least you have acknowledged that there's a problem, that's a step towards dealing with it