I dont understand...

OMG that is so unfair on children in the families.

So sad that some people can have lots of babies with out really trying. I have two friends who can't and it took us ages to have our son.

i get so when peole who can't afford to, or don't have a good home environment have kids !!!

WHY.

I'm TTC and we are on the student loan - but then we don't smoke, drink, spend money on junk food or other things. We have plenty of money really, because we're careful with it - As soon as Mike gets out of Weltec he should be earning a decent income. Breastfed Cloth nappied babies are not exactly expensive either!

EDIT: I don't agree with people living on the dole for years and having kids though. There's a difference between working towards something good (like qualifications) and sitting on your butt collecting money! It doesn't help that alot of these people are addicted to drugs, cigarettes, alcohol, gambling etc...

Edited by AliaDawn

mummy_becks wrote: Shy as an excuse for the sickness benefits - that is sad. There was a woman up in Auckland that tried to get Limited Full Time Status with StudyLink just because she has children. I was like well I should just do that too. She didn't get it approved (as it isn't a valid reason) and is now trying to get the Training Incentive Allowance from WINZ. I'm getting a student loan and I smoke (I know its bad and I do want to quit I just need to be in the right frame of mind to do it), but my DH earns money (funny thing is he is paid by the government) and we still manage to pay our bills and live quite well.

There's a difference between smoking and smoking Sorry if I didn't put that very well - I mean the people that put their habbits before their children...

Dont get me wrong I was teen single mum on the DPB at a young age but I worked my arse off to get a career to give my kid(s) a better life. BUT I  defintely did not sit around with my hand out repopulating the district.

Also after having Alize and finding myself in the same situation as I was 11years earlier I REFUSED to go on the DPB and lived off my mat leave payments and  family assistance until I had to go back to work.

Gosh I would love to stay at home having all the children I could manage but geez food, clothing and shelter have to come into the equation somewhere....DONT THEY??? 

I don't get it either.

I guess because for us, whether or not we could comfortably afford to have a baby was a big issue in our decision to TTC and plays a part in the timing of TTCing the next. I know at the end of the day, you make do and you get by and you survive but we felt it was/is the responsible thing to do. I guess you don't commit to something that huge unless you know you can manage it financially. That whole living within your means mentality.

I don't understand it either shouldn't want the best for their kids and for them to grow up with goals and ambitions their just passing bad habits down generations.

yeah it makes me really cross, too. Alot have no ambition to do better than the struggle street they came from and that Bene's are a right, its almost learned behaviour with some. I think its blardy terrible.

you know i see it too kels...and working in manurewa OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! it is generational...

i am sorry - i would LOVE to have eight kids...but there is NO way we are having more than 2 or 3 (thats still up for discussion!) - I want my kids to have opportunities in life and to able to give them to them.

My mum went back to work for less than the DPB at the time...cause she had pride - as a solo mother nonetheless....yet i see too much now of 5 kids to 4 fathers...or worse 8 kids to one guy and they are each on a benefit cause they dont "live" together!!!

BTW your can get an additional payment on your DPB if your kid has asthma...I mean seriously???? we got sent a high user application for ella for medical cause apparently she was sick enough to need it...there is NO way we are applying and sponging off other taxpayers like ourselves...we dont need to and we both pay in the highest tax brackets so i feel somewhat entitled to be P*ssed off when people rip US off!!!!!!!!!

Yep, we see alot of the same people coming back through us too, they don't change the situations or the risk factors to their pregnancies so their babes end up with us time and time again.   I never knew that going with the job i do would be SOOOOOO many social issues. I thought i was going to nurse babies and that's it, it's really amazing to see babies still allowed to go home with some parents sometimes.

I also don't get the generational thing. WHY?! seriously!

I mean sure dad was in the army, so before him and mum split it was probably all ok $$ wise. but none of my sisters have actually gone on to do anything. They left school after school C, and had kids, never did any training courses, never anything else. Now in 30's with teenage kids, and still have no inkling, fair enough be a SAHM but to have NO ambition at all, none, not wanting to follow ANY of their own dreams or interests or even hobbies! Me, I must be a different kettle of fish, now i think this is going to sound harsh, but i find it embarassing, that really, since mum had my brother 40 years ago, that she has had a few part-time jobs and that's about it, that at age 60, she doesn't own much more than the faded furniture she bought with dad back when i was a baby, and that she depends on benenfits to get her through. Some not her fault but i can see her her own lack of spirit or enthusiasm for getting out there and trying anything rubbed off, we were never really encouraged to try, to do much, i remember envying the kids who had parents that went to parent teacher interviews, i never had that.

For me, all i wanted to do from when i was young enough to realise that not everyone's families were like this, was do my best, try my best, work darn hard, and get the hell outta there. I am determined to turn my own little generation around, i encourage my kids to try new things, to find a passion and go with it and to have something to look forward to. I have tried to tell my sisters to go out and find their passion, that mid-30's is young and they should find something that interests them and study or go for it cos in a few more years the kids will leave home and them knowing them they'll probably say "oh, now it's too late, i'm too old to try that now.." (lol, i kinda already get this from them NOW!)

Everyone needs dreams, and i find it so hard to beleive that all some people's dreams equate to is to finally get to 18 so they can get the dole.

Edited by mum2paris