Wheni had paris, my mum would come around alot and i found it actually really hard, but i was stubborn and thought it meant that she thought i couldn't do those things myself. My sister came to stay for a weekend when Paris was 2 weeks old, and i was so thankful for her, she'd get up at night when i went to the lounge to feed Paris, and she'd keep me company, and she helped mike out with things around the house - when she left after those couple of days i was such a mess, i wished she has stayed longer.
When i had Ayja, i sucked it up of course and realised it was just people trying to help. My sister arrived the day Ayja was born (ayja just couldn't wait and i had her that morning before my sister even got on the bus!) And she stayed for 2 weeks, it was wonderful, it meant that i got to have time to bond with ayja, and gt to know her, and my sister again just helped mike with the house, and with looking after paris.
I would say it really depends on the type of people you are going to have stay. You need people who are going to pick up the slack where you need it, and not intrude on what you are needing to do/learn with the baby. You also definately DO NOT need people staying that are going to still expect you to cook/clean up after them, or such like - they should be told where to go pretty darn quickly.
I think sometimes it is nice to have those first few weeks to yourself, but then also i think sometimes that's the most important time to have people helping out cos the first weeks definately are the hardest so it's good to have all the support you can get during that time.
I would definately say for me, I am soooo grateful for having my sister come on the day i had ayja - i could relax and know things were being taken care of at my house, i knew she'd make sure mike took care of himself too, i knew that Paris would have her hair done each day for daycare while i was in hospital and that it wouldn't look like a one handed monkey had done it
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You need to be sure that whoever comes to stay, no matter when it is, is going to be there all for you and hubby and the baby, It's not a free holiday.
If they're going to be great, then i'd say the first few weeks would be best so that by the time they leave you are in a routine of some sort and things will seem a bit easier by then anyway. That's the main idea of people coming to stay and help you - so that you get time to adjust to life as a mum with lots of support, and not having to worry about all the other guff.
If they're probably going to be a bit more hassle and stress, then maybe have them come about a month afterwards when you've had more time to recover.
Hope that helps.
Mum helping..when?
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