TM Feedback, WWYD?

Last week I sold an item to a trader, she rang the twice the next day and emailed, very keen to arrange pick up.
We agreed on a time the next day for her to come and collect it, but she never showed.
I waited around all day with no contact from her until I finally sent her a friendly email asking what had happened and if she wanted to arrange another time.
She replied late that night saying they had had a family emergency and that she would be out of town for the next few weeks and would be unable to complete the trade.
She apologised and gave good feedback and I relisted the item.
I wasn't too bothered, a little annoyed that I had to wait around and a little annoyed that the item is still hanging around because I want it out of the way BUT, the thing that really bugs me is that I was a little suspicious of her story (because I am a bit of a cynical meanie sometimes) so I checked her profile and she has logged in every day since the trade, completed several other trades, buying and selling, and on the day she was supposed to be collecting my item she won an auction for a different one of the item I was selling!
So it was obviously a load of rubbish that she fed me about having to rush out of town for family emergencies, she just preferred the other item and had no qualms about not contacting me to cancel the trade.
I'm torn about what kind of feedback to give. Part of me says "Sh!t happens, let it go" and part of me wants to red face her because if she'd got in touch, told me the truth and been genuinely apologetic I probably wouldn't have been bothered at all!
Gah! PMS!

Give her bad feedback and be done with it...warn other traders about her...I would like to know if someone i was trading with did this and explaine in your feedback your detective work so she cannot reply with the family emergency thing

I work on the theory that other traders use feedback as a way to measure whether they want to or should trade with someone, and if you put that you have reason to believe that trader is a dud (maybe neutral instead of negative) it may save someone else the hassle. It costs you money to list stuff and she's wasted both your time, and money and that's not fair on you. Trademe likes to know about those sorts of people as well as they give the site a negative ... whatever.

Mind you, having said that I've placed honest feeback a few times and been given retaliatory negative feedback in response for my trouble which is a pain in the bum

Daizy on a side note (sorry for the threadjack) .. your girls have the cutest bunks ever! Are those going on TM .. id snap them up

I do not know haw she could give you bad feedback if she did not complete the sale    You should also go through tm to get your fee back. they will contact her and ask her to pay the fee.

lilfatty wrote: Daizy on a side note (sorry for the threadjack) .. your girls have the cutest bunks ever! Are those going on TM .. id snap them up

Tehe, I dont think they are going to be going anywhere anytime soon They are quite well built into the closet space. I still havent finished them (just wait till you see the mural I do plan on getting around to painting one day)

They really weren't too difficuilt to build...

kaiz231 wrote: I always worry about giving bad feedback... once I gave bad feedback to a girl who claimed a storm took her computer, even though she was still logging on every day. I gave her bad feedback and then SHE changed her feedback and gave ME a red face!!!!! Grrrr.....

You aren't allowed to do this - its against TM's rules.

I would give neutral feedback....

Thanks for all the replies and advice.
I think I'll go with a neutral like you said Ginger, hopefully it will make her think twice before mucking anyone else around.

Hehehe, soooo tempting!
If only my sleuthing skills and motivation were that good!

Black list her too....

Sounds exactly like a trader I dealt with. I went out of my way & the 28 day period for refunds ( which I didn't realise existed) I would email and say when I'd be home during the week & I did this for ages & then I got sick of having to be home when I said. Mine was a big items so I was being helpful but still....

But she logged on each day & then in the end didn't bother to contact me at all so I tried to get a refund & couldn't so I wrote to TM & they saw that I'd posted bad feed back & refunded me I would have liked something to happen to her as she'd done the same thing with quite a few people.