Sharing the load - how do YOU do it?

I'm not good at sharing the load. DH would be totally happy with a 50/50 split but I have a kinda old fashioned wife/mother mentality (for myself only...not for others).

Will think on it though and post later :)

Yeah, I kinda wish my DP did a bit more round the house, although he does do all the laundry, which is awesome. But I do everything else, including all the childcare, apart from bathtime. He thinks that cos I work part time then I should do it all, which, yeah ok, kinda makes sense, but sometimes it would be nice to have a rest.....

I get Joshua up in the morning, get him dressed, breakfast, etc. I take him upstairs with me when I shower, have about 5mins to get ready, then out the door. I drop him at daycare, go to work, work 6 hours then collect Joshua. Then we usually go to the playground for a while, then run errands. Then home, cook his dinner, give him his dinner, tidy house, start on our dinner, play with Joshua, then DP gives him his bath while I cook our dinner, then I read Joshua his night time story, take him to bed, finish cooking our dinner, eat, clean up, arrange lunches for next day, then bed. Thats my day during the week. Except on Thursdays when DP is at Uni, so I do the bath as well.

On weekends DP sleeps in, so I do the same morning routine, then when Joshua is sleeping at midday I get all the cleaning done. And when we have my stepkids its even more work. Oh, and when we go out I get the bags and stuff sorted with hats, sunscreen, snacks, drinks etc.....

Yep, I do waaaaaaaaaaaaaay more than DP!



Edited by joshierocks

We're very 50/50 in our home and it tends to swing in either directions sometimes eg. at the moment, it's about 70/30 in DH's direction while I'm doing IVF and dealing with that stuff.

He does most of the cooking and often cleans up after himself as well, is usually the one who empties the dishwasher, we share the vacuuming although he probably does it more often than me, I do the 'girl' cleaning - cleaning out the pantry and fridge, dusting, that sort of thing. I do the bathroom and toilet cleaning, washing the floors, washing and folding the washing (although he does this too every now and again), we walk the dogs together, though for whatever reason someone's only one of us does if he's working or I'm sick sort of thing, and we also make up the grocery list and do the groceries together. He's banned from doing my ironing, but sometimes I do his and he's chief in charge of making me a hot chocolate before bed!

It's very much a team effort in our house - there are swings and roundabouts where sometimes one is carrying a bigger load than the other, but we're big on working together.

I do 100% of internal household chores (cooking, cleaning, putting rubbish out, childcare). If we require external house maintenance (cleaning gutters, building work, etc) DH does that. We run our own business, I manage the office and DH is out and about. He generally works a minimum of 5.30am - 7.30pm five days a week and 7am - 5pm Saturday and sometimes Sunday.
I feel that the balance is fair.

Usually we are around 50/50 but I do feel that at the moment B is doing more around the house especially while I'm adjusting to graveyard and study and gym training...(i was one of the 6% that said I feel like I should be doing more)

I am to say that DH does way more at home then I do.

He vacumes, he cut the grass, he dusts, he cleans the toilets, cooks dinner (Weekdays only). Takes out the rubbish etc

I look after Zaara, feed her, bath her, read to her, put her to bed, do the laundry, iron, cook in the weekend etc

We take turns doing putting and bringing the washing, washing dishes etc.

Yap DH des way more that me and then he also spends time with Zaara after dinner.

The reason is I start a bit late in the morning and therefore getting Zaara up, brushing her teeth, hair, changing her, feeding her breakfast, and taking her to day care. While DH Finishes quite early (3 - 3.30pm)..so he pickes her up and while she is catching up with her Disney channel he cleans/cooks etc.

I guess he wishes I did more but at the moemnt we are going with the flow!

But when I will be home with new BUB for 6 months, I will be doing most of the cleaning and cooking!

Oh and when I was pregnant DH did so much more...he made my lunch every morning (to make sure I was eating well)

I do most but its only fair since I'm a SAHM and he works. I do everything inside but about once a week Ben will cook dinner and do the vacuuming. We have turns getting the kids up and dressed, we don't really have any schedule but it works for us.

Ben does the outside jobs tho and puts the rubbish out. I'm not touching that

Its all ME ME ME ME, that is because he isn't here. But when he was here I would say he did more than me.

I can't really work out how it is in our house. Probably along the lines of me 70/30. Dh and the kids get up before me weekday mornings, but Dh doesn't do anything for the kids, but maybe get Gia a milo. Once I'm up (around 7:30) I make the kids breakfast and dress them etc. Dh then is off to work around 8am. I mostly do the dishes and washing, tidying. We have a housecleaner once a week who does the bathrooms/toilet, vacumning, dusting, change the bedsheets on a Wednesday. If Dh is home from work around 5pm (somedays it's earlier, other days later), one of us will cook, while the other baths the kids. Then both of us share putting the kids to bed. I feel dh needs to help out more, just with general tidy and cleaning up after himself. His dirty clothes just sit on the bedroom/bathroom floor even though I have a washing basket in the bedroom for that. I'd like him to empty the rubbish bin when it's full and pick up his empties! I think I have to pick up after him, more than I pick up after the kids! But then I can tell the kids to clean up their toys, whereas asking Dh to pick up his things is like talking to a brick wall.

Maya wrote: I'm going to be interviewing a relationship/marriage counsellor to get his tips for sharing the load, but I'd love to hear your thoughts on how you do things in your household.

Emma, I can't wait to hear what this guy says!!