Temperament - I don’t understand

How similar are your kids temperaments to your own? This topic is really fascinating to me.

...how is it that 2 parents, who are quite similar temperament wise, from 2 families of very quiet and gentle people can produce a kid who is the TOTAL opposite of them?

Elle is an amazing joy but she is also loud, demanding, a control freak (for want of a better term), fiesty and can be very grumpy. There is almost nothing gentle about her. If she can run freely she is the most delightful child ever but at home she is 95% fiesty.

Her Dad and his family are very VERY laid back and "cruisy" people and my family are quiet and reserved, albeit perfectionists.

I thought things like tantrums, shouting, screaming, hitting etc were learned but there is no way at all that Elle has witness these things, nor have they been encouraged in any way and yet her behaviour is dominated by them at the moment. She MUST have what she wants, exactly when she wants it. I often feel bad, like I'm doing something wrong but it really is just temperament. Over time we will be able to "direct" her determined energy but at the moment it is just growing day by day. I'm wondering if it is a sign of intelligence...large potential and large frustration at the limitations of being a small person.

What are the different temperaments in your family like?

Oh also some of those behaviours are probably age appropriate and transitory. I remember a couple of kiddies I taught at preschool being monsters turning into lovely calm laid back kiddies!

YEah, it is funny when you have quiet parents and then this loud, full on kid - they sit there at parent interviews shaking their heads wondering where they came from!

Fiona you just decribed out Mikey course he is just like me where as Alan. Like you say it is nothing you are doing just the way she is and as she get older you will be able to direct her.

yummymummy wrote: Hmm I can't say we are all that different. We are all quite happy and relaxed normally unless we are not getting what we want Seriously though Gina is quite a happy relaxed baby so hoping the next one will be too - will be interesting to compare their personalities once we have more than one. Both my parents & DH parents say Gina is a more happy relaxed child than either of us were but she too has her moments. I don't know if you can really get a child that is quiet and introverted all the time. What were you and DH like as kids?

Well we all know parents have selective memories but apparently we were very calm, relaxed and happy kids. Neither slept a lot during the day but neither got upset about it...we both just loved to watch the world go by. I was a talker from an early age, just like Elle, but I wasn't grumpy or loud.

Edited by FionaS

Apparently Arabella is like I was as a baby - really content and social but I can see my stubborn streak coming out in her already - Even at 3 months she knows what she wants lol

Bella definitely takes after her father...very laid back and cruisy (unlike me who is highly strung and impatient !)

Don't know if you believe in the whole "babies choose their parents" but perhaps there are some lessons to be learnt by having a 'feisty' (for want of a better word) child...? I know Bella is teaching me to chill out a bit more!