| Author |
 Topic Search  Topic Options
|
Bobbie 
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: North Shore Auckland
Points: 6123
|
 Post Options
 Thanks(0)
 Quote  Reply
 Posted: 13 November 2007 at 3:42pm |
 cuppatea wrote:
hmmmmmmmm, sorry still sounds suspect to me. Is easy to say he didn't do anything when he has destroyed the evidence.
Sorry but I would be checking everything now, his bank accounts, his wallet for reciepts, his e-mails the whole lot. I would actually demand his wallet off him the minute he gets in. If he has nothing to hide he won't mind. I would also get his phone and take it to a tech to retrieve the messages.
If he refuses to allow you to check anything then I think that is a good indication that there is more to it than he is letting on.
|
Hate to say it but I agree with cuppatea. This 'coming clean' story doesn't seem to sit right. Maybe it is the truth but you need to confirm this either way. I caught my DH in a lie (not cheating thank goodness) and he had a couple of goes of 'coming clean' before I got to the bottom of it. That was hurtful enough so I can't begin to think about what it must be like for you 
|
|
|
 |
|
Sponsored Links
|
|
|
Bombshell
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 6665
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 13 November 2007 at 5:08pm |
ok so i am a suspicious person (according to BSDH!!!) so I would do this -
demand he show you the last months cell phone bill (believe me I just saw someones whose DH was cheating for sure and it was up over $500!!!)
see if there is repeat pattern to the numbers on it being called!
Check out the counselling one way or another
I would never put up with a cheat and DH knows he doesnt dareeven think about it....and having been through it himself he knows how bad it would feel! PLUS i would cut off all his bits and feed them to the dogs...do you have dogs??? Ill lend you a couple! 
|
|
ElfsMum
Senior Member
Joined: 04 June 2007
Location: Christchurch
Points: 11702
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 13 November 2007 at 7:03pm |
|
i agree..i didn't want to say that in case it upset you but he's come clean twice now with different stories..and although you would love to believe him i think he isn't telling the truth..because of the different stories..and because he fought you for the phone and needs to retrieve the msgs which means that he needs time to figure out what to say to you :(
as everyone says we are all here for you !!
|
|
Mum to two amazing boys!
|
|
busymum
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 12236
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 13 November 2007 at 7:26pm |
|
I actually disagree with most of the other people on here. I think he is trying to put things right and I know it is possible to get random flirty txts like that. So what I'd be wanting to do is spend some time together (if Jaxon doesn't sleep through, get a babysitter for a night perhaps) discussing what you guys are going to do to get out of the mess etc. Let him come up with suggestions as to breaking off contact, accountability, etc. I reckon any couple that can get through to the other side of this would be far stronger.
Didn't Lizzle recently post a similar kind of story? You might want to PM her for ideas.
|
|
|
|
lizzle
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 8346
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 13 November 2007 at 8:17pm |
|
i have pmed her already Teresa!!! hehe
|
|
mummy_becks
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 14931
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 13 November 2007 at 8:55pm |
Or me I went through this a few months ago and Liz helped me out.
|
|
I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
|
|
fattartsrock
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 6441
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 13 November 2007 at 9:05pm |
|
OMG!!! you poor ladies!!!
Personally, If there was nothing in it, why didn't he tell you about it from when she first text you? Rod gets hit on in his job (and he's sooo not brad pitt) and he always tells me straight away, and I can (and do) look at his phone any time I want (I am very suspicious person by nature, been screwed over too many times). Just the fact he went to so much trouble to "break" the phone, then tell you "he" would retrive the texts for you. I personally would be wanting to do that myself and if there is nothing to hide or to have to "explain away" then there will be no problem.
We are probably not helping saying this, it's probably what is already going through your head already.
Hugs to you
Edited by fattartsrock
|
|
The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P
|
|
Andie
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 3614
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 14 November 2007 at 10:31am |
Kellie, at the end of the day you'll have to weed through all the stuff he's told you and decide what you think is the most likely scenario. If his story keeps changing, that's a huge red flag though. And if one of them 'couldn't wait till this afternoon', either they had something really exciting happening that they'd told the other person about and needed lots of energy for  , or it could be just what it sounds like when you first read it. At the end of the day, no-one will judge you for staying or leaving, regardless of what you do or don't find out when (if) you get to the bottom of the story, 'cause a marriage can be a complicated thing. But remember that you don't deserve to be cheated on or have to worry that it might happen - you've been a loving and devoted wife and a fantastic mum to his son. He might have his reasons for getting flirty with another woman, but that doesn't excuse it in my books.
|
|
Andie
|
|
cheating husband???
