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jack_&_charli 
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Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: christchurch
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 Posted: 19 September 2007 at 10:47am |
i would definately call 111......imagine how you'd feel if you didn't and the person was killed 
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my4beauties
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Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: NZ
Points: 6264
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 10:58am |
Those guys who didn't want to get involved should be ashamed & disgusted in themselves! Women don't have much chance against men, men generally are a lot stronger & scarier!! I know when my DH & I playfight he normally wins & has me pinned to the floor in seconds. I wouldn't want to know what would happen if it ever got into a real violent fight , i'd have no chance....
Therefore anyone that hears of any violence going on SHOULD ring the cops! If it was 2 guys in the street fighting you'd call them wouldn't you?
In our old place we lived last year on a busy main road, the house about 3 doors down with young people living in it often had parties & one night it got out of control & a fight broke out & ended up out on the main road, even at night-time the traffic was busy. My brother & his wife lived right next door so called the cops straight away.
YOU SHOULDN'T HESISTATE AT ALL.
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My babies: R (9),G (7), J (5) 
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MummyFreckle
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Joined: 08 February 2007
Location: Auckland
Points: 4120
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 3:14pm |
 Italiah wrote:
Those guys who didn't want to get involved should be ashamed & disgusted in themselves! Women don't have much chance against men, men generally are a lot stronger & scarier!! I know when my DH & I playfight he normally wins & has me pinned to the floor in seconds. I wouldn't want to know what would happen if it ever got into a real violent fight, i'd have no chance....
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I think that my previous post may have been mis-understood. DH and I would have NO hestitation at all calling the cops, but in our circumstances and situation (when it was our neighbours) their house was full of very large PI men, and my DH is not a big guy, so it just wasnt an option for him to go barrelling over there and get involved. (They had previously made threats to me over the fence..) You never know if people are going to be armed and how they would react to a third party. I know its cowardly - but surely the best thing to do is call the cops and let them handle it. If it was going on out on the street and there were other neighbours around to help then I think its a different story.
I think the guys talked about in the original post sound like they were "shrugging it off"...and thats not acceptable. Most guys I knwo (DH included) would be on the phone to the cops straight away if they thought that DV was going on anywhere in their neighbourhood.
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my4beauties
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Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: NZ
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 4:13pm |
SimSam wrote:
Italiah wrote:
Those guys who didn't want to get involved should be ashamed & disgusted in themselves! Women don't have much chance against men, men generally are a lot stronger & scarier!! I know when my DH & I playfight he normally wins & has me pinned to the floor in seconds. I wouldn't want to know what would happen if it ever got into a real violent fight, i'd have no chance....
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I think that my previous post may have been mis-understood. DH and I would have NO hestitation at all calling the cops, but in our circumstances and situation (when it was our neighbours) their house was full of very large PI men, and my DH is not a big guy, so it just wasnt an option for him to go barrelling over there and get involved. (They had previously made threats to me over the fence..) You never know if people are going to be armed and how they would react to a third party. I know its cowardly - but surely the best thing to do is call the cops and let them handle it. If it was going on out on the street and there were other neighbours around to help then I think its a different story.
I think the guys talked about in the original post sound like they were "shrugging it off"...and thats not acceptable. Most guys I knwo (DH included) would be on the phone to the cops straight away if they thought that DV was going on anywhere in their neighbourhood. |
I agree, sometimes it's best not to get involved at all - & calling the cops straight away is best option.
I haven't read your original post simsam, so my post wasn't based on what you'd said, if that makes any sense .
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My babies: R (9),G (7), J (5)
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Rachael21
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Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 5:25pm |
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Yeah I would of rung the cops especially since she was calling for help.
I agree with you simsam i don't think i would want me or dp to get involved as imagine if there were more men and they came over and did something to us or even worse, our kids. If people ar low enoguh to beat up people smaller than them, then they could possible be low enought to have weapons. I remember a story where a guy got involved to help a girl out and ended up getting charged with assault because the girl backed her bf up.
There was a fight across the rd a while back where we heard them fighting and then heard her yelling out how he hit her and would he hit her again. I wanted ben to go over there but he wouldn't and then the guy left and the girls mum turned up so we left it. Haven't heard anything since.
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Rachael21
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 5:25pm |
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I just thought I'd add tho if it was kids getting beaten up dp would probably try and do something.
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Anna
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Location: Auckland
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 7:24pm |
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I second (third?) not getting personally involved! If there is a situation I would not hesitate to call the cops but if I felt uneasy nothing would make me get involved. It is one thing to help another person but ultimately it is important not to put yourself in a dangerous situation.
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Anna
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caraMel
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 7:39pm |
Anna wrote:
I second (third?) not getting personally involved! If there is a situation I would not hesitate to call the cops but if I felt uneasy nothing would make me get involved. It is one thing to help another person but ultimately it is important not to put yourself in a dangerous situation. |
Totally agree. Esp once you have children to protect and be there for at home. Its just not worth the risk!
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Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and:
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buzimumto3boys
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Joined: 16 September 2007
Location: North Shore
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 7:42pm |
Personal safety would always come first for us as well.
I have had very serious threats made on my kids by a gang member in the past - police were involved etc so I know how scarey a threat from practical strangers can be!! So I certainly wouldnt confront them if you didnt have to!
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Chovynz
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Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 8:54pm |
SimSam wrote:
I dont think that guys shrug this off - we had an incident like this next door to us, and although we called the cops, DH wasnt going to go over / get involved either. We talked about it afterwards, and he said that his logical brain told him that if someone was willing to smack his wife / gf around then they wouldnt think twice about beating the crap out of him or coming over and laying into me. I think that most men would be horrified / disgusted at this behaviour. |
I'd call the cops. Simsam's DH said it well.
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Defending the male species since 1980 
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 19 September 2007 at 11:46pm |
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i think you should call the cops, because, well thats their job int it? and i dont think you should ever go in no matter what you can hear happening, your not doing the victim a favour if you end up getting beaten to and incapable to call.
I think basic rule is speak up but use iniative,always keep your own personal safety at the forefront of your mind
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Chovynz
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Posted: 20 September 2007 at 8:15pm |
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I read a book once. It said don't get involved in other peoples arguments, that's like grabbing a dog by the ears and shaking it. It'll come after you and bite you in the A$$.
DV isn't really that much different, i guess.
But, that same book said defend the helpless, so... iono.
guess i gotto go find my baseball bat or something. But then if the DV-perp is smart, I'd be had up for assault. And go to jail and not see my family. So...
Get involved? go to jail?
Call the cops? get told to calm them down?
Do nothing and have nightmares about the screams and cries for the next year or two?
Crazy world we live in.
Edited by Chovynz
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Defending the male species since 1980
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DV next door... do you ring the police?
