Older Parents

A 60 year old man could live to 100 - a healthy 100, or even 90 (I know a lot of spry 90 year olds) giving their children a good quality 30-40 years.

A 20 year old could smash his car up at 25 (just thinking stats) thus giving his children 5 years.

A family needs love. Everything else can become irrelevant so long as basic needs are met, and there is enough love.

Edited by miss

It's scary to think of, I think we decided that we didn't want any kids after 30, simply for the reason of we have seen the bad side of things.

My mum had my sister at 40, and now here she is, turning 60 this year, in renal failure and still watching out for my younger sister who's at home bludging, is abusive, and treats mum like a maid, as well mum's a full-time guardian to a hell-on-wheels 3yr old. I have seen the bad side of things which skewed my view a bit, that and well, maybe if it had been her 1st or 2nd kid at that age, yeah, fine, but after having 1st one at 19, by the time she got to my sister, number 6, she was over it and just let her run riot and didn't give a stuff anymore.

Who cares about age, i think it's attitude really and fitness and ability, who says a 40 yr old can't run around the yard with their kids it's up to them to stay healthy and most can do that perfectly well.

Mike has the same opinion on not wanting kids after 30, but that's influenced by the fact that he's still trying to live up to his parents example of having him at 15, him moving out when his mum was 32-ish, and them having a whole heap of fun now independant, pretty well off and doing lots of neat stuff holidays, set up well.

I think the main thing i worry about actually is mike, it scares me that already i can see him loosing muscle tone, he has no body fat, he gets sick much quicker and for longer these days and we have no idea what's causing it. I worry that if this is how bad it's gotten after 8 years, how long it will be before it affects his life alot. but as Emma said, who knows how much time we have.

The main thing i try to tell my mates though, the ones who are waiting and waiting and wiating, is that, well, don't leave it too late, it is well known that things start getting harder ofter mid 30's. There are so many many women who spend their 20's trying not to get pregnant, then sttle, marry and start TTC in their mid 30's once the carreer and the house and travelling is done, only to find it's too late, their body won't do it, and that for me is sad, sad that they didn't know this sooner, or didn't try sooner cos adding in all the tests and treatments etc the chances of having a baby take longer and get more remote as the time ticks by - definately not wanting to be a downer, but I do really feel for the ones who waited so long then find they can't have them. Am forever saying to my mates that yeah all well and good, go do all the fun stuff, but don't leave it too late.



Edited by mum2paris

I don't know but i guess you could call Neil and i older parents as we were 36 when Fay was born, but i was in a panic when we found out we were pregnant cos i felt like i was too young to have a baby
We are hoping that having Fay will keep us young through our middle years, she will probably be the responsible one tho

Yep so true about how long you have to go.

My friends friend died last year in a car accident and he was 29 and left behind 2 kids and 1 had just been born she was only 5 weeks old when he died.

oh and even tho its sexist by 60 i was talking about women who have babies and lie about their ages in order to qualify

none of us know when our time is up , fact is none of us are invincible,but i would rather die knowing my heart got a chance to love my daughter than not.

that said, i hate the thought of leaving my girl, I would be so worried about her