When I talk about the attachment needs in your relationship most people think I’m nuts. That I’m being unnecessarily touchy feely. “I don’t need him to be attached”, she thinks, “I just need him to do the stinking dishes!”
What I find HILARIOUS is that most of the new mummies (and maybe dads, too) have signed up wholeheartedly to the idea of Attachment Parenting. We make dads strip down for kangaroo care bonding sessions. We are disgusted by the idea of “crying it out”. We nurse until they’re old enough to ride a bike…
According to Dr. Sears (godfather of the Attachment Parenting movement), there are 5 points:
We want our kid to be attached to us. We want them to know we care, and that we’ve got their back (especially when they’re in distress).
Don’t we want the same thing with our marriages? Don’t we want to know someone gets us and actually gives a damn when we’re in distress? Didn’t we get married so that someone would have our back during the good times… and the bad?
You want a kick butt marriage? Get attached to your spouse.